Rules for Whovians
by asmidgeofexcitement
Summary: Exactly what it sounds like. Something my Doctor Who club and I came up with. So far, 1-60 are up. There are far more.. Open for suggestions! Rated T to be safe, because I'm immature.
1. 1 through 10

**So for some stupid reason, FF deleted this during their freak-out session over ratings. Don't really get it. Here it is again, because I'm a rebel.**

* * *

Rules for Whovians:

1. It is TARDIS, not Tardis or tardis. And **YES**, it MATTERS!

2. A blue box is NOT just any blue box. Obviously, through a skewed process of elimination, it is, in fact, the TARDIS.

3. Allons-y is the first thing you cry in a moment of adventure.

4. When you hear the word "doctor" you never think, "Oh, white lab coat and hospitals."... However, you **_DO_** think of stethoscopes.

5. No matter how much you want the Doctor to find Rose again, you want him to be ginger even more.

6. Something turns up missing, so obviously it fell through a crack in time and space.

7. (this one's for girls (or guys?...)) "Captain Jack Harkness," and a sly wink is all you need a guy to say.

8. Yes, the TARDIS is sexy, deal with it.

9. Eccleston was a good Doctor. No, he wasn't 'like Tennant', but still. Shut your face.

10. Yes, 10 likes putting his sonic around his mouth. Does not infer anything. Jack, don't even... Go back to Ianto. (Torchwood reference)

* * *

**I AM OPEN FOR SUGGESTIONS GUYS! :D 11-20 will be here soon.(very soon)**


	2. 11 through 20

**Yey! 11-20! :D These ones are slightly more immature... XD**

* * *

11. 11's sonic is NOT "compensating" for anything in relations to its size compared to 10's. Now get your mind out of the gutter.

12. Sonic screwdrivers are not "compensation", but rather "representation" ;3

13. ALL DOCTORS ARE THE DOCTOR DAMMIT! Just because they are not Tennant, does NOT mean they "suck" or "will never replace Tennant". If you like the bloody show, you will LOVE the bloody Doctor, no matter HOW MUCH you bloody hate the actor!

14. Never try the Adipose diet.

15. River Song is a troll.

16. You will always have something spoiled for you if you are not up-to-date, no exceptions.

17. The relationship between River and the Doctor will always be slightly wrong, due to the fact that she IS his best friend's daughter.

18. Doctor/Dalek fics exist. We must deal with it.

19. There ain't no party like a Timelord party because a Timelord party isn't bound by temporal parameters and thus, don't stop.

20. Those who are not scared by weeping angels either lie or are blind.

* * *

**REVIEWS AND SUGGESTIONS PL0X! XD**


	3. 21 through 30

**Wow, i've been getting lots of hits! Not reviews, though... :c come on guys! I'm running out, i need suggestions!**

* * *

Rules for Whovians 21-30

21. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor's cute, bugger the fruit.

22. Beware of mysterious cracks. You just may get erased from existence and wake up as a Roman.

23. Running is the best way to work out.

24. Bow ties ARE cool.

25. So are fezzes, Stetsons, pirate hats and bunk beds.

26. Don't blink, whatever you do, don't blink.

27. The TARDIS lock is a multidimensional, triple-encoded temporal interface and NOT susceptible to pointy things.

28. The Doctor lies. (( I know, this should have been rule 1, get over it ))

29. Time is not a line, but actually – from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint – it is a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff.

30. Happy tears aren't just for humans. Time Lords can get them, too.


	4. 31 through 40

**So I've decided I've spoiled all of you enough with these rapid updates, but- Oh hey, look at that! Shameless self-promotion! :O**

**Rule 30, part b: Those who read Rules for Whovians so devotedly should prove their love for me by at least checking out my other Who fic that is an ACTUAL story, zomg.**

**I know. Weird, right? But seriously. It's called 'Back With Jack' and the only thing I want is for it to be as popular as this one. And it's all thanks to my AMAZING readers that this sh- sorry, crap is so popular, even though it isn't a legit story, so. *shrugs***

**Anyways, some more rules or something, idek. I don't agree with Rule 33, but it was necessary.**

* * *

Rules for Whovians, 31-40

31. If you have more than one shadow, you might end up as a skeleton.

32. Always bring a banana to a party.

33. Beans are evil.

34. Being 907 doesn't always mean that one has not had any intimate relations in 'a while'. But it might. We'll never know.

35. Inevitably, if you become emotionally attached to any character, the writers will promptly make you regret any such decision.

36. JB is _NOT_ Justin Bieber. It's **John Barrowman.**

37. The Doctor knows all languages. _ALL._ Including, but not limited to, cat and baby.

38. Sometimes, maybe once in a million days, everybody lives.

40. The chameleon circuit on the TARDIS can be fixed if the Doctor just tried hotwiring the fragment links and superseding the binary- well crap, I forgot the rest. Fancy that?

* * *

**(If you don't get any of my rules, just ask me, and I'll feel free to clarify and make you feel stupid, lolz. But I've heard rule 34 isn't as straightforward as the rest. It's based off of Amy's remark in S5, E5: Flesh and Stone when she's trying to seduce him.**

**Doc: Amy! I am 907 years old, don't you understand what that means?**

**Amy: It's been a while?)**


	5. 41 through 50

**Hey guys, chaps, mates, bros, buddies, rabid fangirls, etc.! *clears throat* This story has officially reached 2000 hits! :D In celebration, here's a chapter! :D**

**I would also kindly like to ask you to check out my other Doctor Who story, 'Back with Jack'. It actually has a plot and I'd really love it if I could get more feedback! :) Rule 43 guys… Abide to rule 43 and at least try the first chapter.**

* * *

Rules for Whovians, 41-50

41. It is spelled 'Doctor Who'. Not 'Dr Who' or any variant of. If you don't feel like writing out the whole thing, put 'DW' or 'Who'. These are infinitely far more acceptable.

42. It should be your goal in life to convert non-believers into Whovians.

43. Whovians will stand up for and support all other Whovians, regardless of anything else.

44. Thou shall not take a Time Lord's name in vain.

45. A fob watch is never just a fob watch.

46. All Whovians must own/ have heard AT LEAST one song by Chameleon Circuit.

47. When you hear a sound even remotely resembling the TARDIS, you will run to your nearest window - if your baser instinct hasn't already done so.

48. Always know where you can find vinegar. You never know when Slitheen may attack.

49. It is required that all Whovians can at least pronounce Raxacoricofallapatorius. Brownie points to those also able to spell it.

50. All Whovians have at least a skewed, elementary knowledge of quantum physics. If you do not, then you have not watched enough.


	6. 51 through 60

**WOO! Series 7 amiright?! I like it, though I know many don't for some reason.**

**Anyways, I've been inspired to come up with the rest of this set of rules! (specifically the last three, which I was having major trouble with…)**

**:D**

**But really, sorry for taking so long, I couldn't think of any more rules… o-o I need help!**

* * *

Rules for Whovians, 51-60

51. If something can be remembered, it can come back.

52. When you hear four knocks, part of your heart breaks.

53. Nose jokes pertaining to Rory are always hilarious.

54. Ear jokes pertaining to Nine are always hilarious.

55. The Doctor's hair defies the laws of gravity. (mainly 10's and 11's)

56. A Timey-Wimey Detector can also boil an egg at 30 paces, whether you want it to or not.

57. On that note, stay away from hens. It's not pretty when they blow.

58. Daleks can be ballerinas if they want to.

59. When in doubt, press buttons, and button-pressing always leads to more button-pressing.

60. His name is Susan, and he wants you to respect his life choices.


End file.
